There is no denying that we’re surrounded by dark conspiracies. Just ask Donald Trump. Obama wasn’t born in the U.S.? Ted Cruz’s father was involved in the Kennedy assassination? He’s just raising the questions. Donald Trump practices bestiality with goats? Maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t. A lot of people are talking about it. That’s all we’re saying.
Naturally, in this environment, many of our readers wonder, “Is the Rotting Post part of the World Jewish Conspiracy?”
Well, as a matter of fact, we are. Thank you for asking. It’s all part of our master plan. Do you see now how cleverly we control the media? One day we’re telling innocent jokes about airplane food1, and the next day: WORLD DOMINATION. You want to tell a joke about airplane food? Guess what? We OWN the rights! See how it works?
It’s fair to say we’ve generated a lot of interest recently, what with the rise of the Alt-Right, the White Supremacists and their ilk. Yet few understand how our evil conspiracy really works. And so, to better serve you, we at The Rotting Post have created this handy diagram.2
We hope you’ve found this helpful and informative.
Notes:
Disk Backup is nightly.
Evilness is bi-monthly.
Contact a representative if you’d like to license any of our in-law jokes.
Footnotes:
1 Did you know that your lasagna also may be used as a flotation device?
2 Of course, all rational people realize there is no World Jewish Conspiracy. It is well known that there are only three actual oganizations conspiring to Take Over The World for their evil purposes:
- S.P.E.C.T.R.E.
- The Pokemon Corporation
- Fox News
Great!
glad you enjoyed.
Reblogged this on Random Musings and Observations.
thx for the repost.
Possibly also rabbits are trying to take over. I walk early, and I keep breaking in on some very suspicious meetings. I’m Jewish and could not pick Zac in a line-up, so right there, no conspiracy. I love you.
rabbits…you might have something there. zac was in ‘high school musical’ and ‘high school musical II’ – the disney channel -which i unfortunately was required to watch, as a parent. and now, post-puberty, he is some sort of hollywood heart-throb. depending on one’s heart. mine does not throb. it kind of snores. 🙂
oh…and thank you!
But you forgot the Jimmy Carter Corporation as one of the organization’s trying to take over the world. How can this post be considered complete without including that? Sheesh.
hmm…maybe that is for another post. there is also facebook of course. but…somehow real gigantic organizations are not that amusing.
I’d kibitz, but I got bupkis …
well done!!!
I had a good understanding of your conspiracy, but missed the flouridation and Hamburgler factors, so thanks for clearing that up. How much to license in-law jokes about Fox News?
hmm, all fox news jokes are free and open to the public. even in-law ones 🙂
I always pre-order a gluten-free, non-dairy, meat-inclusive vegetarian meal on long distance flights.
No joke.
for a second i thought your post was for the wrong piece. i’d forgotten my own airplane food joke!
Zac Efron? Isn’t he a member of the Illuminati? Oh my God, you don’t think….
i’m sure he is in many evil organizations. most especially, ‘high school musical’ 🙂
If only Donald Trump did practice bestiality with goats! On second thought, even that wouldn’t hurt his popularity one iota. It would only hurt the poor goats.
As for conspiring to take over the world, you forgot about Empire carpet. Their 800-588-2300 Empire Today jingle contains nicotine or some other addictive substance.
:). yeah, there are a lot of organizations i left out, clearly. for example Cirque de Soleil.
One of the best diagrams I can ever recall.
shows i have spent too long in the business world.
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